1.
2.
hungrily awaiting a time
a BBQ that will never come from the ground
to hear what you are finding
doing myself alone
shooting baskets filled with grassy blankets
my shoes tell lies about another sad corner
scattering like lost moths
dreaming receiving
half-baked marveling at it all
unsupported irony humbly
I sure hope perhaps
undone by my own repetitions
tiny Xs in the air holding my phone
the mismatched plastic chairs my clothes
saying all kinds of without
my mind crying
parted like greasy hair
trying to look like I'm not
smashing down remainder feelings
while feeling 2000 miles away
so hollow the invisible bedrooms
I watch the scrawny kid chewing gum
all the soil turned over
on a website I can't name
pretending to be young radiance
blacktop dying quietly
tiny Xs in our eyes taste really great
none for revision or about you
tradition the invisible bedrooms
my mind 2000 miles away
the form-fitting youth without
new-found bed always on time
handing rocks thru a fence
I sure am without you
but our fields left fallow rocks
thru a fence we parted
greasy hair crowning the head
that youthful sense of danger
on the arms of strangers
for the 4 millionth time
flushed and gleaming
like the hand of a lost child
found and barely feigned
lost without you I just can't
coughing alone smudging
I cross the street outside in the unrelenting light
warmed over by zoned out intuition
I'm getting nine sunburns
smashing the universal distance
a lack of faith while feeling so hollow
in exactly 2 tiny days
with Xs in the air
crying in my sleep
about your barely feigned communiques
trying to look like I'm holding my phone
zoned out intuition
I'm not trying
seconds after peeling the cracked cement
the mismatched plastic chairs
in words say "crushed hands"
dying to hear what can be heard
the sun coughing alone
2.
trying to look like I'm not feeling
so hollow the invisible bedrooms
hearing what you are doing
distant and lacking faith
a scrawny kid pretending to be young
a shooting sense of danger
dirty and unresponsive while you're elsewhere
smashing down remainder feelings
the 4 crowning the head of a hope
your brownies holding my phone
filling the glassy blankets
the cracked cement lost lost lost
dreaming without without without you
none for trying I watch
while revision or tradition hungrily waits
my clothes will never come
saying all kinds of things on the arms of strangers
seconds after peeling all the soil
turned over flushed and gleaming
dying quietly
from the ground crying
while I sleep things cool
zoned out by dirty intuition
I cross the street in exactly 2 days
we scatter like moths
another sad corner
tiny Xs in our eyes
crushed hands dying
no feeling in my future shoes
tell lies about me
finding me alone
only tiny Xs in the air
chewing gum for the millionth time
my mind 2000 miles away
our fallow fields left lost
found and lost without you
down remainder feelings
in exactly 2 days the heat the sun
receiving half-baked on a website
I can't cross the street numbly
cooled unsupported perhaps
your own repetitions undone
unrelenting communiques
in the barely feigned light
we park outside the greasy radiance
blacktop dirty and unresponsive
to hear what can be heard
marveling at all the words I just can't say
all taste really great
like the hand of a child warmed over by the universal
while you're elsewhere and unresponsive
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